True power requires modesty and empathy, not force and coercion, argues Dacher Keltner. But what people want from leaders—social intelligence—is what is damaged by the experience of power.
https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/power_paradox
I just read a fascinating article by Dachner Keltner. Everybody thinks that in order to lead you have to be ruthless. Manipulate, deceive, control. Whatever it takes to hold on to your power. If you have power you can use it to benefit the company. Keltner argues that this is just not true. Instead, the best leaders are those who are in touch with the needs of those they lead and are focused on helping others succeed. This take a lot of emotional intelligence!
The problem is that the very emotional intelligence that helps leaders rise to the top of their companies is damaged by the power that they hold. This is the power paradox. We promote people as leaders who understand and serve the needs of others, but then the power that we give them makes them no longer able to see the needs of others.
The power paradox requires that we be ever vigilant against the corruptive influences of power and its ability to distort the way we see ourselves and treat others.
Dachner Keltner
It takes a lot of emotional intelligence to become a leader. You have to understand the needs of your employees and your clients. It is those who really understand the emotions of others who can truly lead well. It takes even greater emotional intelligence, though, to continue to lead well once you have power. It takes continual diligence to examine our own motivations and make adjustments to the beliefs that our driving our behavior. When I find myself growing angry and resentful of those I lead, I need to take a look inside. Am I falling prey to the power paradox?
To learn more about the power paradox, check out the excellent article at The Greater Good.
To learn more about identifying and managing your own emotions, join us for our next EQ Workshop!